This 2-Minute Monday Mindset is to help you deal with others in difficult situations
Every one of us inevitably encounters difficult conversations with others. I teach medical providers how to out-negotiate some of the most difficult people on the planet – personal injury attorneys. But whether you are talking to an attorney, a vendor, a neighbor, or anyone these difficult conversations can be incredibly uncomfortable. Heck, let’s be real: we are scared to have them!
So how can we remove the fear when we are confronted with difficult conversations, even attacks?
First, realize where the difficulty is coming from.
If it’s you, acknowledge it to yourself and maybe even them.
If it’s not you, acknowledge that to yourself and realize it’s them, their past, their issues.
Recognizing where the difficult is coming from gives perspective, appreciation and understanding.
Second, stand up for yourself, respectfully.
Many get contentious, defensive, or seek to deflect away from the subject.
Don’t take the bait! You will only add fuel to fire.
Instead, control the discussion and get things back on topic with a simple statement.
For example, “I appreciate what you are saying but it doesn’t pertain to our discussion today.”
So you both validate their feelings yet redirect the conversation.
Third, if they persist, lather, rinse and repeat.
Meaning, you repeat your response merely changing the wording.
You might say: “I prefer not to discuss that as it’s simply not relevant here.”
Finally, once you remove the attempted diversions and even attacks, get things back to what matters.
Don’t wait for them to respond to your statement above.
Immediately shift to what you really wanted to get to, with perspective, appreciation and understanding.
Give better than you may be getting. Follow this 4-step process:
Realize where the difficulty is coming from.
Stand up for yourself, respectfully.
Lather, rinse and repeat if they persist.
And immediately shift things to what you really wanted to get to.
By removing fear from these difficult conversations, you empower yourself.
By removing fear, you can address anyone on anything.
And I’ll see YOU at the next 2MMM!
