This week’s 2-Minute Monday Mindset is getting past our mistakes that embarrass us which hurt us long term and how we can change that long-term negative self-talk to merely a momentary impact.
We are humans. We make mistakes. Personally, I’m always calling people by the wrong name all of the time. It is a failing that has haunted me throughout my life. I also beat myself up about it. It’s embarrassing.
Maybe you’ve made a mistake like that. Those mistakes can have us so embarrassed we avoid situations or even people.
So how can we recover from the mistakes we make? Do we let those mistakes take us down with others, ourselves and our future? Or do we use a growth-mindset and self-awareness to control our self-talk?
I learned a technique to shift my self-talk, and I want to share it with you.
Make a small circle and then a big circle around that small one. In the small circle, write down what happened. Like for me: “I forgot Mark’s name, and I’ve known him for a long time!”
In the bigger circle, write what that meant to me … my interpretation and internalization. For me it was: “I’m stupid”. That self-talk haunted me every time I was with people.
The solution is actually quite simple. The smaller circle with the fact never changes. It happened! What I can control is the bigger circle. The one that has my self-talk. I can simply erase the “I’m stupid” and replace it with:“I’m not perfect and just not good at names.”
To change my thinking from “I’m stupid” to “I’m not perfect and just not good at names” was a game changer. Yes, I’m still embarrassed, but I’m no longer haunted don’t avoid people because of it.
So when you make a mistake, remember the 3-step approach:
First, control your internalization, use the two-circle approach, and change the outer circle self-talk.
Second, own your mistake and acknowledge it, and you will find others are quite forgiving.
Third, forgive yourself, as no one is perfect, and mistakes are human and part of having a growth mindset.
Finally, move on. No more negative self-talk. You made a mistake. That’s all.
And I’ll see YOU at the next 2MMM